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UK soldier killed in Iraq attack

News in Brief: Sunday, May 29th, 2005

The Ministry of Defence has announced that a British soldier died in Southern Iraq after his convoy was attacked. Lieutenant Skabbi Hijabi, of the Iraqi police, described the incident to New World Odour.

“The convoy was attacked by either ‘freedom fighters’, or insurgents. To be honest, it’s difficult to tell them apart. In the confusion, the British soldier was distracted long enough for him to trip over several charred corpses of Iraqi children. He fell onto the body of an American soldier, and inhaled lethal levels of radioactive depleted uranium dust. With medical attention we might have been able to keep him alive for a few hours, but friendly fire killed the doctors.”

The MoD has issued a premium rate phone number for relatives worried about the welfare of family members serving in Iraq. The proceeds will be used to drop more food parcels and cluster bombs.

Regime change

Administrivia: Tuesday, May 24th, 2005

The revolution is over. The coup was successful. New World Odour is now different. The world will never be the same again. Unless we go back to the old scheme which, to be honest, wouldn’t be that difficult.

The new regime’s manifesto covers this single issue: We no longer do monthly issues. New articles will now be published as they are written. Those of you paying attention may notice we’ve not done a monthly issue for almost a year. A gold star for you.

We’re currently adding all the old content from the previous issue format but will be creating new content from now. The old issues will remain online as a historical record, but you may not discuss them. Tell your friends and enemies.


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