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Breathing danger: Young people at risk

News: Tuesday, November 15th, 2005
Group of kids, engaging in the dangerous practice of breathing
A breath dealer provides
their next fix

In the wake of the death of a youngster attributed to a lip piercing gone MAD, leading doctors have given warnings about other activities that young people are involved with which could lead to disease, death or even worse.

“Clinical statistics show that almost 100% of young people have breathed within an hour of their death,” said Dr Simon Reactionary, chief registrar of the Daily Express Hospital for white Christians and soft-porn stars, Battersea. “We are aware that a growing number of children and young people are becoming involved in this deviant practice of breathing and it can only lead to unnecessary injury and untimely deaths. The government has given us £17million to fund a five year research project to investigate this causality further – which shows they are taking the problem seriously – and we are hoping for laws to be introduced in the next few months to curtail the take up of this dangerous habit.”

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