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Apple announce new iRaq

News in Brief: Saturday, May 10th, 2003

Apple this month introduced the new DU iRaq. All DU iRaqs are constructed of high density depleted Uranium alloy, providing protection against incoming fire. The new DU structure is 40% more radioactive than the ‘PowerRaq’ natural Uranium design, demonstrating that Apple have responded to the customer feedback about slow uptake of genital deformities with the older model. “Battlefield computer storage just got better” said Steve Jobs, Apple CEO. “We expect to be shipping large numbers of these iRaqs over to our boys fighting Saddam, in that Arab country I forget the name of right now.”

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