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Bush distracted by bee

News in Brief: Monday, July 26th, 2004

A press conference on climate change hosted by President Bush went awry recently when he was distracted at a crucial point by a bee, severely limiting his ability to give coherent answers. Ordinarily the President’s armed guard ensure this kind of thing doesn’t happen, however in this instance they were pre-occupied watching the Chevy Case film Caddyshack on a monitor behind the scenes.

“It’s impossible to fight the war on terror when the very air we breathe is full of funny buzzing flying things” Bush said later in a prepared statement. He also declared that bees are agents of Saddam Hussein and possibly his pinky-pals in Al Qaeda. The Whitehouse confirmed that the matter is in hand and that “in future, the location of all press conferences will be throughly machine gunned beforehand to ensure no insect interference”.

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